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A Few Things I Know For Sure

With John Patrick Adams
Thursday, August 17, 2017 3:16 PM

Becky Can't Comb Mixed Hair

By: John Patrick Adams

So last night I had dinner with 5 amazing, beautiful, educated, talented and creative women…  2 of which are married and the others, you guessed it “Waiting for “Mr. Right for Me””…  I love meeting up with these women because they always bring a viewpoint that is interesting, unique, and sometimes borderline ludicrous…   But it’s conversations like the ones we have that holds the power to change the world if they go beyond the moment…


So last night the whole “interracial dating” topic came up...  This is where the title came from, a fellow CANCER gave it to me (SUCH CREATIVE PEOPLE)...  Am I opposed to interracial dating???  Of course not…  Would I marry outside of my race???  Of course not…  You see marriage isn’t for me, so interracial marriages or marrying within my race is not an option… However, I believe people should have the right to choose freely without being judge…   What was interesting about our conversation is these women believe SOMEAfrican American men are chasing the dream…  You know “Chasing White”…  They’ve experienced African American men who have made it known and clear dating WITHIN HIS RACE IS NOT AN OPTION…  Are they aiming to date Caucasian women???  Not sure, BUT they’re for sure not targeting African American Women…. 


Now these ladies seem to believe it’s because of various reasons…  Let’s go ahead and pull the sheet off the Elephant standing in the middle of the room, they believe it’s because Caucasian women are more submissive whereas African American women aren’t putting up with; taking, nor accepting the dominant and controlling behavior of African American men…   So is this truth???  Not sure, however I believe in some instances African American women can’t accept or don’t want to accept the freedom of choice and also when an African American man chooses a woman of another race, indirectly they make it about themselves…. 


So what do I mean???  Well secretly I believe SOME women when seeing a man of their own race date outside of it, they compare themselves to the woman he chooses…  Secretly they believe the other woman  has something they don’t…  That he believes in his mind women of other races are better than women of his own…  Now I know some African American women believe there is a shortage of Good African American men, so they believe “Becky with the good hair” are stealing the few that are left…  Can something be stolen that is left up for anyone to grab???  


So why do African American women believe African American Men are crossing the lines???  Well SOME African American women have said it’s because he wants a baby with “Good Hair”, beautiful eyes and light skin… There are those African American women who have said it’s because he wants blonde hair, blue eyes, and big boobs…  Back in the 70’s and 80’s it was because he wanted a woman who was willing to perform oral sex…  And then there are some who say it’s because he can’t deal with the strength, attitude and sass of an African American woman….  Well ladies, can it be that maybe he’s had bad experiences with African American women???  Can it be that maybe he’s suffering from generational curses of watching how his mother treated his father???  Or here’s a good one, can it be that he just chooses to date outside of his race??? 


Whatever the case may be, What I know for sure is…  His choice has nothing to do with the beauty of who you are…  His choice has nothing to do with the strength you possess…  His choice has nothing to do with how smart, ambitious, and driven you are…  His choice has nothing to do with your hair, lips, hips, booty, or your eyes…  His choice is his choice, so let him make it…  If you’re not the type of the one you want, find the one whose type you are…

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